Thoughtful Saturday

Today I slept late because my dear Hubby let me. I needed it I believe, and even enjoyed it. Before falling asleep last night, however, something important hit me.

This Christmas is important. It has felt important to me for quite a while but I haven't let myself look to see why it is so important. Last night I finally let myself and was startled by what came: It was a simple question of, what if, as in, What if this is the last Christmas Hubby and I ever spent together.

No, I am not saying I am keeling over anytime in the next year, but if you really love each day and you love the people in your life, you really should live each and every day as if it is the last day or year you have with them so they will always know just how much you love them and how important they are in your life. I want to show Hubby just how much I love him, how important he is to me, not just today but for Christmas and for every day we have from here on out. The same goes for my friends, of course, but Hubby is at the top of the list. He rightly should be there, too. So, this Christmas is important, and every day there after. It is almost a pre-New Year's Eve resolution thing. It is that important to me. He is that important to me. My life is that important to me of late.

Sometimes it seems I let myself get all caught up in writing and pushing toward getting things published and the daily grind I forget just how important this life is to me, and, sadly, I forget just how important Hubby is in this life of mine. I don't want to forget or let it slip to some segment in the daily grind I don't give much attention to, or merely glance at throughout any given day. This life of mine is something that is extremely important, even if it is important to no one else but me (and my darling husband).

I am not sure why I thought of this exactly, and, I suppose, it doesn't really matter. Each and every day I should be looking at my life in this manner and not just taking it for granted I am going to wake up the next morning and continue forward with my same old daily routine. Because it just might not happen, and if it doesn't happen I want to leave the people I love with enough of myself left behind for them to know just how much I love(d) them and just how important they are (were) to me.

Some people may look at this and say this is a morbid way of thinking, but, it isn't really, not if you seriously give it a thorough examination. I have just examined my life and found several areas lacking. Instead of making me feel depressed or stressed, it has made me take stock enough to say, "I want to change this. I want people to know just how much they matter to me." And, quite honestly, I believe this is good. If we don't examine our lives every so often we, as humans, have the habit of forgetting we even have one, and all we become then is a combination of meetings, paychecks, bills, and taxes, not a lived life. I believe I would much rather have a lived life that than other sort.